"Let me in!" I cried. "Let me in, let me in!"
"Not by the hair of my chinny-chin-chin!"
He cried and I could see him grin
(Right through the straw)
So I huffed, and I puffed, and I blew
Wouldn't you? Now tell me true,
Wouldn't you blow, too?

Now that little pig could see the house saggin'
So he took off with his suitcase draggin'
Out to the sticks where his brother's place
And I followed him with egg on my face
(Not really egg. That is to say, I was embarassed).

"Let me in!" I cried. "Let me in, let me in!"
"Not by the hair of my chinny-chin-chin!"
They cried and I could see them grin
(Right through the sticks)
So I huffed, and I puffed, and I blew
Wouldn't you? Now tell me true,
Wouldn't you blow, too?

Those pigs knew they were now in a fix
So they headed out for the house of bricks
Where their brother lived and he'd worked hard,
He even had a flower garden in his yard
(That's the moral of this story:
Buy a brick home!)

"Let me in!" I cried. "Let me in, let me in!"
"Not by the hair of my chinny-chin-chin!"
They cried and I could see them grin
(Right through the bricks)
So I huffed, and I puffed, and I blew
Wouldn't you? Now tell me true,
Wouldn't you blow, too?

Now that brick house was no way a'fallin'
So down through the chimney I went a'crawlin',
But inside a fire was burnin' there
And I could hear 'em puttin' out the silverware!

"Let me out!" I cried. "Let me out! Let me out!"
"Not by the hairs in my snouty-snout-snout!"
They cried and I heard 'em dancin' about.
So I slumped, and I jumped, and I flew
Wouldn't you? Now tell me true,
Wouldn't you fly, too?

Mama's read that book to me
I know what you must do.
Take that food to Grandma's house
And be careful who you talk to,
And your Mama says:

Little (little) Red (red) Riding Hood
Creepy creatures roam these woods.
I'd go with you if I could
Little (little) Red (red) Riding Hood.

Soon you'll meet that wicked wolf
With a smile on your face,
Then he's gonna take a shortcut
Through the woods to Grandma's place,
And he's gonna say:

Little (little) Red (red) Riding Hood
Creepy creatures roam these woods.
I'd go with you if I could
Little (little) Red (red) Riding Hood.

He'll get Grandma locked away
As you knock upon the door,
Then a voice will say, "Come in, my child,"
But it'll sound a little sore.

That's 'cause it's NOT GRANDMA!
But you don't know that, so you're going to say,
"Grandma, what big eyes you have."
And the wolf's gonna say,
"The better to see you with, my dear!"
"But Grandma, what big ears you have."
"The better to hear you with, my dear!"
"But Grandma, what big teeth you have!"
"The Better To Eat You With, My Dear!"

"AAHH!" you'll scream as the woodman comes
To save this awful day.
Then the three of you have lunch together
And you go on your way,
And Grandma says:

Little (little) Red (red) Riding Hood
Creepy creatures roam these woods.
I'd go with you if I could
Little (little) Red (red) Riding Hood.

I heard her cryin' while she was tryin'
To spin that straw and make that gold.
I said I'd do it, ain't nothin' to it,
And the worth of it all could not be told.

And what's my name? (Rumpelstiltskin)
Say it again. (Rumpelstiltskin)
Oh, but she don't know it and I won't tell
The name that fits me oh, so well,
Rumpelstiltskin. Rumpelstiltskin.

She gave me things, a necklace and a ring,
But on the third night she had nothin' for me.
"I want your son then, if you have one
He's mine, all mind, for eternity."

And what's my name? (Rumpelstiltskin)
Say it again. (Rumpelstiltskin)
Oh, but she don't know it and I won't tell
The name that fits me oh, so well,
Rumpelstiltskin. Rumpelstiltskin.
(Live version, story narrative)

The queeen had the baby but then she said
"Maybe I could guess your name and keep my son."
So I let her guess it, though I confess it never
Could be guessed, I was just havin' fun.

And what's my name? (Rumpelstiltskin)
Say it again. (Rumpelstiltskin)
Oh, but she don't know it and I won't tell
The name that fits me oh, so well,
Rumpelstiltskin. Rumpelstiltskin.
(More story narrative)

Well, some kind of messenger must have run back to her
And said he'd seen my song and dance
Because the next day I heard her say,
"Is your name Rumpelstiltskin, by any chance?"

She knew my name! (Rumpelstiltskin)
Someone's to blame! (Rumpelstiltskin)
Who could have told her? Now did you tell
The name that fits me oh, so well?
Rumpelstiltskin. Rumpelstiltskin.
(Ending story narrative)

"Look up, look down. Look all around! Can you see at all?
Wondrous things, oh so big, once were oh, so small."

"My son, these beans here in my hand look oh, so small to you,
But plant them and you'll understand what faith and hope can do.
I'll trade you for that cow you'll sell for only milk and bread.
With courage, son, all will be well, believing what I said."

"Look up, look down. Look all around! Can you see at all?
Wondrous things, oh so big, once were oh, so small."

And so I traded with her that day, but came back home to find
My mother felt a different way and said I must be blind.
"These worthless beans aren't fit to eat!" she cried, "Son, can't you see?"
And I was too afraid to sing the song just sung to me:

"Look up, look down. Look all around! Can you see at all?
Wondrous things, oh so big, once were oh, so small."

That night the moon shone on the beans a'scattered on the ground,
And where they lay a tall beanstalk could easily be found.
I climbed into the clouds until I heard the giant snore,
And there, inside, my father sat tied up upon the floor.

I set my father free and he said "Son, my harp, I swear, the giant stole it!"
So we stole it back and ran away from there.
The giant gave chase, but we escaped and soon were safe below,
And father sang the song to me he'd written long ago:

"Look up, look down. Look all around! Can you see at all?
Wondrous things, oh so big, once were oh, so small."

Later on, when he was gone, and my step-sisters were mean
I'd find a quiet corner and dream of better things.
And I'd sing "You can be a princess if your heart is pure.
You can be a princess, Cinderella, for sure."

Soon the king put on a ball for the prince to find a bride.
My step-sisters looked beautiful and when they left I cried
"You can be a princess if your heart is pure.
You can be a princess, Cinderella, for sure."

Then my fairy god-mother came and said that I could go.
She made a coach and driver and a dress that I loved so.
I hardly could believe my luck, my dad would be so proud,
And when the horses drove a way I sang his song out loud.
I sang "You can be a princess if your heart is pure.
You can be a princess, Cinderella, for sure."

I met the prince and we fell in love and danced beneath the moon,
And when the clock struck midnight it happened far too soon.
I had to run and hide because the magic now was gone.
I even lost one of my slippers as I ran on and on.

But he searched with my glass slipper then, as far as he could see
Until he slipped it on my foot and whispered quietly,
"I love you, oh I love you. Will you marry me?"
And he said "You will be my princess for your heart is pure.
You will be my princess, my princess, for sure."

"Who's that trippin' over my bridge?
Say, who's that? Tell me who!
Who's trip, trappin' over my bridge?
Say, I'm gonna get you! Uh, huh!"

"Well I'm the little billy goat. You don't want me.
Wait for bigger billy goat. He's fine as can be."
There's a groan and a moan:
"I hate waitin' but I will,
'Cause I see somebody over the hill..."

Bigger brother billy goat, looking for food,
Starts to go across the bridge
And hears something rude.
There's a growl, and a howl:

"Who's that trippin' over my bridge?
Say who's that? Tell me who!
Who's trip, trappin' over my bridge?
Say, I'm gonna get you! Uh, huh!"

"Well I'm the bigger billy goat. You don't want me.
Wait for biggest billy goat. He's fat as can be."
There's a groan and a moan:
"I hate waitin' but I will,
'Cause I see somebody over the hill..."

Biggest brother billy goat, looking for food,
Starts to go across the bridge
And hears something rude.
There's a growl, and a howl:

"Who's that trippin' over my bridge?
Say who's that? Tell me who!
Who's trip, trappin' over my bridge?
Say, I'm gonna get you! Uh, huh!"

"Well I'm the biggest billy goat. You can't eat me.
'Cause I'm the meanest billy goat you ever did see!"
There's a fight, it's all right.
The goat crossed. The troll lost.
The End. Uh, huh. Uh, huh. Uh, huh.